Here’s one from the “Nice Try Dude” department. A coked-out Hunter Biden wannabe sat in his Henderson, Nevada, condo last Friday and by his own accounts ingested a gram of cocaine (that was in addition to the three grams he said he had ingested earlier in the week) before shooting up the surrounding condo buildings with more than 100 rounds from an AR and a handgun and then jumping from the second story window and busting his head open.
Police were called to the scene and found 45-year-old Joseph Ebner lying on the ground and bleeding from his head before police, with the help of residents, carried him to an ambulance that took him to the hospital for treatment.
But once he was able to talk, oh what a story Ebner would tell.
According to Fox 5 in Las Vegas, this is what Ebner had to say about his actions:
At the hospital, the suspect told police that he had been robbed by two men and “he had fired his weapons at them in self-defense.” He added that he lived alone in his condominium, though he occasionally had his children over through a 50-50 custody agreement. The children were on a cruise with their mother at the time of the shooting.
Ebner told investigators that he had been “speaking to people online” and that “two males were coming over to his apartment for a possible encounter.” He also admitted to being a cocaine addict and said he had ingested approximately four grams over the course of the week, with close to one gram of cocaine being ingested earlier in the evening.
He continued by explaining that a group of males who he could not describe had broken into his residence in “an apparent robbery attempt.” Ebner described the suspects as armed, with some having lasers on their weapons.
Ebner said they entered through multiple points of the residence, and fearing that he was being robbed, he pointed his weapon at the door. He said that as soon as the men entered, he emptied his 9 mm handgun, firing all rounds. He said he then transitioned to an AR-15 and fired approximately 60 more rounds.
First off, Ebner can kiss that 50-50 custody deal with the ex-wife for the kids goodbye. For him, those kids might as well be on a permanent cruise to anywhere but his home.
Secondly, what kind of “encounter” with “two males?” We won’t speculate on that that one. That’s Ebner’s real or imagined businesses. He does live in the shadow of Las Vegas after all. When in Rome…
Finally, police ultimately found he had discharged at least 112 rounds—93 from an Anderson Manufacturing AR with a 30-round mag found beneath the window he jumped out and 19 from the 9mm handgun—at his alleged attackers. Oh, and speaking of those intruders, police never found any evidence to support his claims that anyone was attacking him at all. But they did find the entire community around Ebner’s condo riddled with bullet holes.
Of course, with five alleged attackers entering through multiple entry points at one time, Ebner was most definitely being attacked by ninjas, who of course would be too slick to leave any evidence they were ever there.
The man also told police he felt like he’d been shot, but upon examination by doctors, didn’t have any gunshot wounds.
Police charged Ebner on 112 counts of discharging a firearm into an occupied structure, two counts of discharging a firearm where a person is endangered and one count of a prohibited person owning or possessing a gun ala Hunter Biden. He was booked into the Henderson Detention Center where he will have time to sharpen his story.
While for many people, using cocaine simply makes them feel like they are full of energy, really cool and popular and people of the opposite sex are totally digging them (even when this is NOT the case), Mr. Ebner skipped clean over that stage with his heavy use and plunged straight into an almost shroom-induced stage of frightening hallucinatory psychosis. Not fun man. Not fun at all. Not cool either.
The takeaway on this one kids just proves Nancy Reagan was right: Just say “No” to drugs…and where necessary, irresponsible gun ownership.
Read the full article here